WHAT DOES IT MEAN EXACTLY?
Does it mean to wear expensive and trendy clothes?
Do I have to always be the buzz-killington of the group by never doing anything fun or spontaneous?
Do I have to be a prude?
Well…. Of course not!
Being elegant has made me a more compassionate, more understanding and a patient person.
Being elegant has made me feel and understand what true happiness is and can be.
Being elegant does not mean you have to pick up an English accent and be everything Kate Middleton is.
Nor does it mean you must do everything perfect and correct others when they are doing something wrong.
That can’t be further from the truth.
Being elegant and living elegantly is to figure out more about yourself than you have before.
You will find that on your journey, that what brings you joy may be something that you would have never believed.
It is mostly about adopting and embracing an attitude.
CHOOSING QUALITY OVER QUANTITY
You begin to choose quality over quantity and not just in what you wear, what you eat, but also how you spend your time.
Now I am not saying that you should stop doing everything that you don’t enjoy doing, like washing dishes.
No, they need to still get done!
But maybe instead of being angry and resentful about the chores, you change your attitude and become excited to fold your clothes or dust your bookcase! (I know that sounds crazy, but it isn’t all that far from the truth!)
This will be a domino effect.
You will respect your belongings more.
You will appreciate everything you touch and come into contact with.
You will treat people differently because you appreciate them and the time you spend with them.
I can speak from experience.
Unless something was done on my terms, I did not want to do it.
If I didn’t want to clean or do things that I didn’t feel like doing, I did them with grunts and a sour attitude.
I absolutely hate how stupid that sounds, but it was how stupid I was.
I was the epitome of a child because I only wanted to do what I wanted to do and when I wanted to.
By slowly changing my attitude and realizing that my attitude had a huge impact on the rest of my day and even the people around me, I knew it needed to change for the better.
Once it did, I couldn’t believe the results!
The boring chores that I would always put off, now I loved them.
I took the opportunity to embrace the moment and allow myself to be present.
It didn’t take just a day, I used to be someone that was always thinking, which is not necessarily a good thing.
I would always wonder if I was nice enough to that stranger or did I possibly say something stupid to my mom, that could have hurt her feelings.
Then I would feel badly and then it would affect me for the rest of the day or longer!
BEING IN THE MOMENT
It was so terrible, not only to me but also to my husband because it would bother me and he knew something was on my mind and there was nothing that he could do.
So after some practice I was able to be more in the moment.
With much effort I would force myself to be in the moment.
I sometimes would have to talk in my head and narrate to myself what I was doing in order to keep myself present.
When you read about it, they make it sound so easy!
And when you read about it, it does make sense and as soon as I would put that book down I would forget everything!
The good thing is that with daily practice and learning, it actually does get easier.
Plus after the effects of it you feel, you will want to keep trying.
It really can be achieved, just don’t give up!
For your own sake, try to spend some time of your day in the moment. It really will help you now, and in your future.
LONG STORY SHORT….
So in conclusion, to live an elegant life is a lifestyle that means:
- You choose quality over quantity
- You live more in the moment
- You find out what truly you enjoy and what you waste your time on
- You celebrate everyday because you are alive and don’t take anything for granted
- Boring chores become something you love because it humbles you and is a good time to be present
- You know you are a beautiful, wonderful, and self-confident woman
- You have stunning posture, are proud of yourself and it shows
Practice makes perfect.
Enjoy the journey and watch yourself blossom into the women you’ve always wanted to be.
Embrace your elegance.
Being Elegant Changed My Life
I feel like it started to change the way I perceived people in my life. I didn’t take anybody for granted anymore.
2. I started to slow down. I saw things that I used to not notice before.I wanted to experience things more passionately and fully, so in order to do so, I had to slow down. This made me aware of things I was missing out. One example is when I was driving the other day, some person clearly in a rush cut me off and decided to speed. As that was happening I noticed the most beautiful pink sky at the horizon that if I was rushing I would have completely missed the beautiful surrounding. When you slow down you will notice and appreciate the little things that once before are taken for granted. Another good example is people who live near mountains, or in other beautiful countries. For the tourists, it is something to be admired to take pictures and to be remembered. But for the people that live there, it is simply just another day, and nothing to think twice about.
3) I became more aware of my body, its movements.When I started adopting my elegant lifestyle and slowed down I also tried to be more deliberate about my movements. I didn’t want to be swinging around or not be in control of my own limbs. I didn’t want to be labeled as a spaz. So in order to remain as elegant as possible I decided to pay more attention to my actions. When I got up, I did so using my muscles in my torso and legs. I didn’t just bounce up out of my seat with my arms just swinging behind me. What ever I did, I did so mindfully, that way to prevent any sort of image of me not being in control. This also span into other parts of my life, a big one for me was getting in and out of my car. It is so easy to just plop down n your car seat. But instead try doing it the lady like way. By being gentle, deliberate, and by slowly doing one move at a time. This takes practice, but one you get the hang of it it becomes second nature and the next thing you know, you’re in control f your body and not flailing around.
4) I became more interested in what I was putting into my body, through food, entertainment, watched, read..This one I found took more time to adapt to. Since becoming elegant, I knew that my late night binge eating of fast food is over. Not because I was no longer allowed to eat junk. No. But because I cared too much about the way I feel. I hated feeling like I was hung over the next day when all I did was have a burger or two. When you start feeling great, the last thing you want to do is feel disgusting again. So you start eating more healthy and it doesn’t seem like a chore. You naturally just want to. This also means that because you respect your body more, you also don’t want to subject it to anything that could possibly dumb you down. Your entertainment might change from watching reality television to possibly some national geographic or something to learn from. You aren’t changing what you are watching because you WANT TO BE elegant. No, you change what you are watching and what you find entertaining because you ARE elegant. You just start to find what you used to like off-putting and not be interested in it any more. You slowly become more refined.
5) I made an effort to anticipate elegance.When you start to become more elegant, it starts to rub off on to other parts of your life. You don’t want something to misrepresent you. Therefore, you won’t have your house a complete chaos. You think in the back of your head, “How would you feel if someone you knew saw your house/your outfit/ your car that way?” Would you be proud of it? These are important questions because when you are anticipating elegance, you are able to let go of other worries and be more present and engaged with the people you are with. Anticipating elegance is a great way to feel ready for anything. It can bring you so much confidence that other people recognize it and admire it about you. Ways you can anticipate elegance is by leaving the room the same way you entered. Before you leave the house, you make sure that everything you are wearing is exactly what you want and that you are happy with it. The list goes on and on but I think you get my drift. By anticipating elegance, you are getting yourself ready for the unexpected. You are understanding that anything can happen and anyone can just drop in and by trying to be ready for it, you appear for elegant and put together.
6) I started to care more about how I was perceived to others.This is not to be confused with caring too much about what others think about you. No, but it isn’t too far away from it either. You want others to think very good of you, That you are kind and would give the shirt off your back. By achieving this, you actually have to do it. You must start to be generous and kind and be patient when it is called for. Perception is reality and how people look at you is exactly how people will know you. So if you think, no I am elegant and because I say I am and act like it, well than others will think I am. But it is not how you explain it or tell people. It is when you don’t speak that has the most influence.. It is when others are in need and how you come to their aid. It is the small gestures that people will always remember.
7) I try to keep my emotions in check…don’t give other people the power to control my emotions.Another way of having control over your body is to not allow someone to have the power over you to make you said or happy or feel anything that you aren’t ready for. By not allowing someone to do this than you again have control over your feelings. You can’t get hurt by someone who doesn’t control your feelings. You can’t feel happy or sad for anybody else but yourself. It’s very hard to remain elegant when you are flying off the handle. And this is something that I struggle with often. But with persistence, I am only getting better. Soon, hopefully it will be a thing of the past!
8) I took care of things I owned, no matter how expensive they wereBecoming elegant has made me appreciate everything that I do have. Whether or not they are worth anything, but to me, because they are my belongings, I will treat them as such. A great example is sunglasses. Before I would always either lose them, sit on them, scratch them, drop them, really anything can happen to them. But after I started on my journey, I now take care of them. I cherish them as mine and because of that I take great care. I only clean them with the appropriate cloth. I keep them in their case. I also don’t just leave them laying around. This is a result because I started to live elegantly. I would think, if they were more expensive sunglasses, would I treat them as such? No. So why is it okay to treat them like they are worthless? Suffice it to say, after my journey I now have purchased a very good quality pair because I have shown to myself that I can do it. I can take care of anything of mine, regardless of price. Because I look at the worth. I appreciate everything I have and I realized how hard I had to work to get everything of mine. Because I now have a better understanding, I will respect everything of mine, even dollar store items, because frankly, it isn’t how much it costs.
9) I cared about others and their feelings, which in turn had more people caring about meSince I take into consideration what others would feel either about a situation or someone I care about how they feel. I don’t make assumptions or think that this is how someone should be. Instead I take a more understanding and compassionate route and because people notice that I am not forcing them into a thought, they start to respect me and my ideas. People will start to ask me genuinely about things bothering them or other personal matters and I will give them straight up true answers. But instead of people shrugging it off, they take validity with it and think they can learn something. It’s nice to care for people, but it is nicer to know that people equally care for you as well. It’s the same as it’s great to be in love, BUT to be loved is another better feeling.
10) I wanted to keep bettering myself.This could mean so many different ways. There is more learning, more money being earned, more life living. It can wrap it all up together and it depends on who you are. But the main story here is that no matter who you are, there is always room for improvement. There is always a way to find different methods to better yourself. You must find what interests you and how you can improve on it. You’ve always wanted to learn another language, well this is the perfect time to. You want to stay current with everything happening in your city or country. Fine with me. This is a spectacular way that living elegantly has changed my life, you really are never too old to keep learning. And the moment you stop learning is the moment you are dead. So, think of everyday as an opportunity to be smarter than you were yesterday.
11) I had a sense of self-confidence that I never thought I had beforeAfter becoming elegant I have become more confident even with strangers. This is not to be confused with cocky or arrogance. This is strictly that once you have developed some elegance you become confident in what you are doing. Who you are meeting and when you look at them you are not ashamed of who you are or where you work. The confidence is very obvious and everyone can see it. It I always see how people on social media look like they are living the high life but in reality they are anyone else. It is a very attractive and gravitating personality trait to have.
12) I allowed myself to sound smarter instead of lower my standardsI didn’t let myself sound stupid for the sake of keeping someone else interested in what I had to say. This one is an obvious one. Don’t think that in order to attract more people in a conversation is to act like you don’t know. I am not quite sure where that became popular and acceptable but it isn’t. There is nothing sexier than someone who can have an intellectual conversation rather than wasting time talking about celebrities and the crazy names they are coming up with for their children. Don’t feel that you need to dumb yourself down to fit in. By not doing so might help others feel that they shouldn’t either. But at the same time don’t put people down if they don’t understand what you are saying.
13) I started choosing quality over quantity.This another obvious one but is needed to be mentioned. This can be related to so many different aspects of your life. Even when it comes to your time spent. You understand your life is short and want it to be the best it can. Essentially, stop wasting time. In regard to every aspect in life, choose quality because it always wins out in the end.
14) I started realizing what was really important to me.By choosing quality over quantity, you start noticing how you spend most of your time. This is helpful when you want to learn more about yourself. You start seeing that you spend a lot of time with your siblings and your other family. You would rather be doing something along those lines, like having a great experience than just sitting alone in your house. It’s a great feeling that once you understand yourself more that you start seeing what is really important to you, and this usually involves family and vacation but maybe it could also be that morning walk or your evening bath. Fill your day with everything you enjoy. This will bring you happiness and fulfillment.
15) Bonus: All the mundane and boring chores, now become something you look forward to.Since you find the happiness in the smallest of all things, you have trained your mind to find pure bliss from something so unlikely. This is a skill that can be honed and is very likely to be one of the best as you age. There is always someone who changes you. Somewhere in your life that makes you realize what you want to be like. I would call this a very pivotal moment and you can’t ignore it. I am sure there isn’t just one moment in life, but there are many and you need to be aware of them so that you can make the best of it. Anything I am saying here, anyone can achieve. This is why living elegantly is so wonderful because everyone has the option to bettering themselves. It also means that everyone had a chance to live their life to the fullest, what ever that may mean for them. It is very personal and yet only you know the true answer. So look inside yourself and see what you can change or improve on to become the most elegant woman you know. No matter who you are you really never got there alone. There was always someone there that was influencing you and I want you to be that for someone else. I want you to influence someone that makes them feel that they should be more elegant. Make the change over to living an elegant life and see how it changes you for the better. It is remarkable how much joy of life. Try it today. Let me know how it feels. Has any one of you ladies ever changed your life to living more elegant and seen any changes? Do you have anything to add? Until next time Keep it elegant! This is not a sponsored post
Feed yourself well
Elegance is being well rounded
Be elegant: Feed yourself well. If you are looking for other ways to improve your life, keep reading!
You are easily influenced by what you surround yourself with on a daily basis. I am sure you’ve heard the saying “You are the average of your five closest friends.”
But if that’s true then shouldn’t the same apply with what you eat? Or what you find entertaining?
When I was a younger (and albeit, stupid) girl, I would ferociously stuff myself with my childhood vice, sour patch kids, to which I would immediately regret.
Not only would my stomach be in agony but my poor tongue! Anyways, there was no way I could be an elegant girl when I felt so rotten.
Even now, think of when you overeat something whether it is savory or sweet, you feel exhausted.
The rest of the night is ruined and you can’t do much else. Plus the next morning, you are still feeling the effects.
It’s terrible! (All this talk might be showing my age!)
But what about feeding yourself in other ways?
Like mentioned earlier, through entertainment? Now with streaming services, binging shows has never been easier.
That means that not only are we are able to be, dare I say, even lazier but we are enabling this past time, allowing it to be socially acceptable!
I’m sure you’re not learning too much watching Punisher!
However, I can hear most of you moaning, “But Jennifer, I’ve worked hard all day, I need a break and I deserve this!”
To which I would respond, “Yes, you did work hard, but it would be like giving someone who lost ten pounds a tub of ice cream to celebrate!”
It will set them back and make them feel terrible.
Everything they did was for essentially nothing.
When you worked hard all day, being the elegant woman that you are, finish the day strong and do something elegant by feeding your mind something that will help you grow.
So let’s work together to be elegant, feed ourselves well!
Feed yourself well
The Guilty Pleasure
What about guilty pleasures you say?
I do have quite a few of those. One being YouTube, which we know could either make you feel stupid for wasting so much time or it could improve your knowledge by watching something educational.
This is a great time to develop a habit that will enrich your mind by taking advantage of videos that can teach you something.
Take your guilty pleasure and turn it into something positive or that doesn’t “waste your time”.
Other ideas to “feed” yourself in a positive way is to surround yourself with beautiful music.
There are many times that we listen to music or some form of audio entertainment and not think too much about it.
However, it is potential growth time.
When you become more aware of the time that you have and how you can spend it wisely, after many years it can seriously amount to something huge!
Sometimes, I wish I would have read more every day. The amount of books I could have consumed would have been amazing.
Practicing something on a daily basis can seem pointless, but I’m going to save that for another post.
Feed yourself well
What are other ways?
What’s left then?
We’ve talked about watching, listening, eating, what about touching? How to feed yourself well when it comes to touching?
What am I talking about?
Well to answer your question, I mean the quality of fabrics that you are putting onto your body.
This sounds a little weird, but bare with me.
Is it not true that when you dress up a little nicer, you actually feel better? This is not anything new.
People have been talking about this for awhile. “Dress how you want to portray to people.” kind-of-attitude, and honestly it does work.
So, I am just going to quickly bring it up here.
The idea about feeding yourself well is about consciously surrounding yourself with anything that can improve your life.
If wearing something of quality and beauty makes you feel like the elegant woman that you are, then it is working.
But it’s important to keep in mind that the elegance always comes from within.
Give yourself some love
Feeding yourself well is a wonderful way to show yourself the love and respect that you deserve.
That is what can elevate you from being just a woman, to being the woman you desire to be.
It’s these little touches that those women who have that “look” use as their secret weapon.
Now, you might be wondering, how can you implement this in your daily life, and luckily it’s quite attainable if you’re willing to work for it.
How to Feed Yourself Well
Let’s begin this with the most obvious of all. Eat well.
Now, this is no food or diet blog and I know just how personal this conversation can be, so I will keep it light.
Eating well does so much for you. It lets you wake up early (in a better mood), you feel light in your body.
And best of all, it takes that little nagging voice and quiets it.
If you think back to yourself how many times that you eat something “bad” for yourself, that you regret it and feel a little stupid.
Either because of your lack of discipline or that you didn’t prepare something else.
That little nagging voice can start quiet and escalate to an ongoing stress that is constantly on your mind.
It can be time consuming and tortuous.
So, prevent the whole vicious cycle of eating junk, feeling bad for yourself, feeling guilty, then mad so you eat something you know you shouldn’t.
Avoid the whole fiasco and eat well.
Another form of entertainment that’s older than television is radio.
Or, perhaps more modern, music, audiobooks, talk radio, anything that needs you to listen.
We spend a lot of our time listening because we are driving, preparing food in the kitchen, running or walking, cleaning, or even just getting ready in the morning.
If you think about all those waking hours where you can do something to better yourself, it’s amazing.
Give yourself the gift of education and knowledge in anything that merely interests you.
It doesn’t need to be traditionally “educational”.
Make yourself feel happier and improved as well.
What medium is best?
Try to find a medium that best fits with your lifestyle.
I know that at the moment, with three boys I don’t watch much television, but I do listen to YouTube often.
I haven’t really listened to many podcasts yet, but I know they can be very exciting.
If anyone has any recommendations please let me know in the comments below.
If you know that you could accidentally get sucked into YouTube’s rabbit hole, which I admit can easily happen if you’re not careful, music is a wonderful option.
Music has a way of relaxing you, pumping you up, making you feel happy, lets you cry out your emotions.
No matter what, there’s a song for you at any moment.
When you feed yourself well with music it can open you up to different thoughts and feelings. It can make you feel beautiful and arouse inspiration.
But what kind of music is defined as “well”, when it comes to feeding yourself?
There’s the classical music which can make you smarter, or at least inspire you to do things for yourself like read a book.
For me, I love listening to foreign music, especially older ones from the 40’s.
This being after World War 2, and their countries being so happy that they won the war and they get to experience freedom, they are also trying to rebuild their cities and fix the damage.
But regardless, the music has such a powerful way to inspire you! Don’t get stuck only listening to one kind of music either.
Expand your horizons and keep an open mind.
I bet that at some point today that you listened to music, you felt inspired and bettered yourself because of it!
Mentioning guilty pleasures, watching “bad” shows used to take up my down time that I almost gave up television.
I feel like there really isn’t much on that can make you a better person.
I know that some of you will beg to differ, but I find that true for me.
I always find myself gravitating towards the junk. (it’s terrible!)
Now, with all the different methods of watching entertainment, it’s almost impossible to escape it!
That’s why it’s so important to choose something that will feed your mind in a positive way.
While some people can argue that there are too many options, I can say that now more than ever before free education is so easy to ingest!
It’s just a click of the internet.
Whether that’s learning a new language, cooking any ethnic culture’s recipe, or reading about the history of the universe.
In reality, there is so much knowledge out there for the taking.
If you choose the right material, you can make yourself a better person.
It’s in your hands.
If watching isn’t your thing, reading is vast.
Like I mentioned before, you need to find what really speaks to you and it also depends on what season of life you are in.
There are times where reading is much easier and more enjoyable, like with older children or when you can take half an hour out of your day to sit down and devour a beautiful book.
The whole idea here is to take what you’re doing already and replace it for something that will benefit you.
You aren’t getting much out of a gossip magazine but if you switch from one of those to learning how to (insert something that tickles your fancy) then think of a year later and how much knowledge you’ve collected!
Even if it is only ten minutes a day, it would be 60 hours a year of learning!
Use your eyes to enrich you, not waste your time and turn you into a zombie, because that is what happens.
This one sounds a little funny but has just the same amount of impact on your life.
Why do you think that the importance of fabrics is held high?
Isn’t it funny when you wear something made of wool your day is ruined, unless you wore a cotton shirt underneath?
Simply because when something makes you feel nice, your attitude reflects it.
Think of this example, so you are feeling extra bloated today and you rushed out of the house and put on the first things you saw.
Which happened to be thick jeans that are always on the snug side and a shirt that rides up (and to make it extra annoying, let’s pretend it is made of cheap polyester!)
How do you think that day is going to be like?
So whatever touches your body needs to make you feel amazing!
You feed yourself well by buying clothes that make you feel more “you” and by wearing makeup that enhances your natural beauty instead of wearing a mask.
It’s very easy to find ways to cover yourself up with clothing, makeup and accessories.
Especially ones that scream so loudly that people can’t see the real you.
By paying attention to the little details, such as how something as trivial as these pants make you feel, you can make the rest of your day better which will affect every aspect of your life. .
It really is all connected.
Feed yourself well
Feeding yourself well will change your life and they really are just the simple switches that you can do on a daily basis.
It might take months to implement all of them in your life and allow time to take place.
If you get really excited and try to change too much too fast, it rarely sticks, plus you’ll get burned out and then the guilty feelings come over you like a heavy blanket.
Trust me on this because it has happened to me before (more than once!)
Try and think of this as a way to get to know yourself better.
Develop hobbies and perfect the ones you have already.
Think of all that free knowledge at the tips of your fingers and how most of us (myself included on this), we just let it go to waste and we spend our time doing something that won’t ever make us better.
By bettering yourself well in all parts, your body will reap the benefits.
Start today and switch out one thing you think is wasteful and find something that you can learn from to replace it.
Let me know in the comments below if you have something that feeds you well!
Being an Elegant Woman
101 Ways of an Elegant Woman
“Elegance is the only beauty that never fades.”
Being an elegant woman is one way to create a beautiful life.
It isn’t what you think either. No frilly or girly things necessary. It’s all in your demeanor and personality.
Here are 101 ways of an elegant woman.
1) She thinks of others and their feelings before her own. People would talk of her as a woman willing to give her the shirt off her back.
2) She NEVER judges others for anything. It’s not her place because she understands that she’s not any better.
The following (on the rest of this post) are affiliate links and that means I might receive a compensation if you click and purchase through these links. See my Disclosure Page for more information.
before we begin…
This is my first notebook that I have released on Amazon.
It’s 200 pages of lined paper and this is a perfect little notebook to keep any of your thoughts or anything you want to improve on!
3) If she has nothing good to say, she won’t say anything at all. Nothing is more unflattering than someone who gossips.
4) Always waits for everyone to begin eating. Once she has a few bites she genuinely finds something to compliment the chef.
5) Keeps up her curb appeal of her house because she appreciates that her neighbors do the same as well.
6) Never talks about anything personal regarding sizes or amounts. No bra size, weight, age, money, how big her house is, nothing.
7) She thinks if her grandmother wouldn’t be proud of her, then she reconsiders her actions.
8) Knows that a resful night sleep and a glass of water is better than any makeup.
9) Never litters. She waits for the garbage no matter how long.
10) Acts as if someone is watching, even if no one is.
I know that these books are a bit older, but these are great ones! I especially love the French Women series, this one is a book that I have re-read over and over again!
If you haven’t read them, it’s from early 2000’s but still is so relevant to today! I promise you won’t be disappointed! Check out the first one in the series that I have honestly read about fifteen times!
It’s helped me become more elegant by bringing awareness to my food.
11) Keeps her keys always in the same place when not using them. She knows life is too short to be wasting time looking for anything.
12) She is never late. She is usually five minutes early. By doing so, she reserves the table, pre-orders drinks and sits patiently waiting. She respects other people’s time.
13) Appreciates an intellectual debate.
14) Doesn’t always need to be right — even if she is!
15) She maintains mystery.
16) Doesn’t even think of going into consumer debt for anything.
17) She isn’t afraid of getting dirty and helping others outside with chores or work in the garden.
18) If anything, she appreciates hard work and the fruits of her labor.
19) She admires a child’s curiosity and doesn’t speak down to them. She engages them with all her genuine attention.
20) Knows life is about the very small and simple pleasures – like watching birds peck at crumbs, smelling the spring rain, ironing the wrinkles out of a shirt.
Honestly, these books are the ones that I constantly refer back to!
Before a holiday, or when people are coming over, I will read The Butler Speaks and I love it so much! It gives me the confidence to know that I will be a good host and what to do in certain circumstances.
I also love Madame Chic, but this one of the series is my favorite. It has opened my eyes to keeping the home.
21) Realizes that fairy tales don’t exist and is realistic when life gets tough. She persists and never gives up, since she doesn’t consider it an option.
22) She knows grass isn’t greener on the other side.
23) Doesn’t like to sleep in – unless it’s cuddling someone special.
24) Isn’t afraid to stand up for what she believes, but does ever so gently.
25) Doesn’t walk around with chipped nails or chipped nail polish.
26) She has a little phone book with everyone’s numbers, address, birthday and any other important dates. She is always keeping up to date with people around her.
27) Sends thoughtful cards on special occasions or at times of need.
28) Carries around a small tube of moisturizer for her hands, because let’s face it, it is not very elegant to have scaly hands.
29) Thinks good thoughts of everyone because she knows that’s the secret to being beautiful. A kind face is more beautiful than what any skilled doctor can do.
30) Practices patience with everything in her life. She takes all the opportunities she gets to master it elegantly.
31) Rarely forgets a name because she finds a method that words best for her. But if nothing works, then after the meet, she writes down the name and a few important things about them. That way she won’t forget.
32) She doesn’t need to yell to get her point across. A calm voice is the most effective tool.
33) Looks to other women for inspiration. She doesn’t need to compete.
34) Doesn’t procrastinate, ever.
35) Wears makeup sparingly, especially during the day.
36) Enjoys learning new things because you can never know enough, to dumb down is not an option.
37) Understands her weaknesses and tries to make them her strengths.
38) She doesn’t waste time on social media or looking up pointless things. Her time is much more valuable.
39) Finds herself true hobbies that she enjoys. She isn’t afraid to take up new ones either.
40) Doesn’t take people or other oppurtunities for granted. She understands that everyone in life has something to offer.
41) Can control herself when it comes to impulse spending. Instant gratification is hard to resist, but the consequences are enough to steer clear of it.
42) She saves up for a rainy day.
43) She can put things into perspective, even when she’s having a bad day. She counts her blessings and changes her negative attitude into a gracious mindset. She knows how blessed she is. Sadly, there are a lot of people who have it worse out there.
44) Writes thank you notes even for the smallest of gestures. She also tries to make it very personal.
45) Goes very gracefully against the grain.
46) Seeks out good books to read, an doesn’t determine them with what movies are out.
47) Finds the colors that are most flattering for her. She doesn’t allow trend setters to determine her clothes. She understands that it is never a fixed thing, rather it is very fluid. She sees how her fashion evolves as she ages.
48) Embraces her face and all it comes with. This is the face she deserves.
49) Wears an apron, even when just doing laundry.
50) Lives by the Gold Rule – she knows what goes around, comes around.
51) Doesn’t wear herself thin, because that isn’t good for her or anyone else around her.
52) Washes her face every night, she knows that consistency is key!
53) Doesn’t fall for the schemes of anti aging cream. Even though she has her weak moments, at the end of the day, she knows she can’t run from Father Time.
54) Doesn’t waste a thing. There are some people that could only dream to have she has.
55) She doesn’t obsess over any one little thing. Being a perfectionist is a curse, so she tries not to take anything too seriously. Through time she has mastered that fine line.
56) Takes pride in everything she does. It can be something as little as cleaning out her cat’s litter box to being a CEO, it doesn’t matter.
57) She isn’t a martyr, if there is a more easier route, she will take it. No need for unnecessary suffering. Work smarter not harder.
58) If someone were to say something bad or unbecoming of her, no one would believe them.
59) She keeps to herself, and can keep every secret.
60) If she makes mistakes, she is the first one to admit it and then immediately rights her wrong.
61) She doens’t feel the need to be superior. Not over her coworkers, not over her friends or her husband.
62) Before a dinner party or a gathering, she brushes up on current events/politics/anything relevant so that she can keep up any conversation without sounding redundant.
63) She tries to learn a new word every day and attempts to use it (within reason).
64) Fits exercise in her everyday movements, instead of designating time at the gym. By doing so, she knows that it is easier to keep it up for the rest of her life.
65) Makes an effort to be present in every conversation. No matter how small or insignificant.
66) Stops and smells the roses, or can appreciate that by slowing down a little bit, life has much more to offer.
67) Cleans up after herself and her responsibilities, like her children or pets.
68) She appreciates quality over quantity, with everything in her life. She would be more likely to have a couple pairs of nice pants then many mediocre ones.
69) Walks properly in any shoe. If so, she practices until it comes naturally.
70) Takes care of her family because even though she is busy, she knows how much they appreciate it.
71) She understands how her feelings and the mood she is in has the power to make the rest of her family the same. With that in mind, unless something is terribly bad, she tries to remain positive. Women have so much influence over their loved ones that sometimes we forget.
72) She likes to wake up in the morning without chores she has to catch up on.
73) She picks one thing to be her signature. Whether it is lipstick, purses, hats, button-down blouses. Regardless, she revels in that look.
74) Doesn’t make the same mistake twice.
75) Doesn’t regret her past because she knows that made her the woman she is today.
76) Strives to be the role model that she wishes she had when she was young.
77) She never forgets to say please, thank you and you’re welcome.
78) She aims to make everyone comfortable around her, if that means sacrificing something she enjoys or her own comfort – so be it. It’s for the greater good.
79) Her husband knows how lucky he is and she also nevers lets an oppurtunity pass her buy to let him know how lucky she is to have him.
80) Has a little emergency drawer that contains birthday cards, sympathy cards, gift cards to coffee shops, and other little things she can easily whip up.
81) Holds her purse the proper way.
82) Wears her glasses if she needs to. This way she won’t squint as much. She will thank herself 20 years down the road.
83) Thinks of everything she does as an art. From doing the dishes to folding laundry.
84) Has a beautiful serving teapot with appropriate teacups and some biscuits for improptu visits.
85) She anticipates elegance in everything she does. In other words, prepared for anything.
86) Listens to all types of music, she cultivates herself to appreciate all kinds of talent.
87) Reads inpsiring quotes everyday to help better herself.
88) Finds peace knowing that there is something bigger than herself out there.
89) Smiles. A readl genuine smile is the key to many things.
90) Keeps personal and meaningful things. From cards from her husband to a movie stub on their first date. Even her dog’s first collar. anything sentimental that bring back delightful memories.
91) She knows life is very short, and she needs to make the most of it. But that doens’t mean to do something stupid.
92) Spends time with her elders to hear stories and other more difficult times, where there was still so much happiness.
93) Thanks God for everything she has.
94) Eats healthily but also gives in and eats what she desires from time to time (practices portion control and discipline).
95) She overdresses for success, meaning that she doesn’t want to appear underdressed and possibly sloppy. Instead, she errs on the smart casual look.
96) She doens’t compare her life to others. Because no one really knows what happens behind closed doors.
97) She loves random acts of kindness. She seeks them out – paying for someone’s coffee or putting in a quarter to an expired meter.
98) Sends flowers for everything. She knows how much other people appreciate it.
99) Loves trying new things, whether it is a new experience or food.
100) She walks with her head held high and her heart open.
101) Knows a little sun, fresh air and a few glasses of water every day is better than any vitamins, green smoothie or magic pill for a long healthy life.
I hope you got some ideas and enjoyed this post as much as I did writing it!
How to look good without makeup is easyAre you one of the three women that absolutely refuse to leave the house without any makeup on? Or maybe you belong to the 44% of women who feel ugly or unappealing when they are not wearing any makeup. That is such a sad number because that is almost half of women who are not confident in themselves nor are they willing to let their own selves be free. I want to show you that you can and will be beautiful without makeup. Not to never wear it again, but to have the flexibility that if you want to go without, you know that you are as beautiful as you are with makeup on. It’s the freedom I want to give you. As you read on, this post will not only explain the different beauty ideals around the world, but tips on how to be beautiful without any makeup!
First, let’s explain beautyBeauty is in the eye of the beholder. That old Greek Proverb may be over used but doesn’t make it any less true. What I believe to be beautiful might be completely different from your idea of beauty. This is a wonderful thing because this doesn’t put beauty in a box. If anything, this proves to show that everyone is beautiful in their own way. I want you do to do something for me. I want you to take a second and answer a few questions (remember the answers while you read this post)
What attributes do you love most about your face?
What characteristics do you wish you could change?
Notions of beauty around the world.Beauty has no boundaries. What we attributes we find attractive in North America and differ greatly in Europe or Africa or even Australia!
Asia:One example is tanning. In North America and even Europe, it is considered alluring to have a healthy glow, even just sun-kissed (no sun worshiping here!) However, in some Asian countries, even having a bit of a tan is seen as working class. The paler your skin was the higher society you belonged to. Although it is still not necessarily like that anymore, the ideas still remain.
Korea:The “double tooth” is so popular right now, that women will go to the dentist to actually get crooked teeth! Korean women find it endearing and innocent to have an imperfection like your canine teeth sticking out. If you want to see how it looks, you can see it here.
France:French women, who are always seen as beautiful, are not typically beautiful. There is a term that I am sure you have heard, called jolie laide. There is more of a natural and easier approach to beauty. If one has a big nose or small eyes, even a receding hairline, it is not hidden or changed. It is embraced. But again, this also goes with the confidence of the women.
Brazil:In South America, the focus is not entirely on the breasts, but it is the larger bottom and wider hips with muscular thighs.
England:Whitened teeth is popular in the States, but go to England and they don’t put the same emphasis on white or even straight teeth.
Mauritania:In the African country of Mauritania, there are food farms to feed their women because they love bigger women. The idea that a woman who is full figured is also higher in status and is seen as attractive.
Iran:Small noses is the norm. It is actually considered “normal” to go through a rhinoplasty surgery for men and women! It’s unbelievable because there are so many more countries around the world and while most are all becoming more westernized, they all still see beauty. Now that there is some evidence that not all see only one view of beauty, let’s carry on to see how it evolved in North America.
Beauty changes with each decadeThe beauty ideal of women changed so much throughout the decades, with factors like fashion and what was going on in the world at the time. The reason I want to bring to light how much the ideal body changes is because frankly, we can’t make up our minds! One day it’s skinny the next is curvy. But the part that never changes is your self-confidence. As long as you can maintain that strong sense of self, to know and feel sexy, then you will become that. Let’s see how much it’s changed from decade to decade!
In the 1920’s –Androgynous – boyish – very little curves. Women were trying to work and be in the work field.
In the 1930’s to 1950’s –Women were curvy and very feminine. Bigger breasts and waists were seen as a much sexier ideal. (That’s why when Audrey Hepburn came to film, people were not used to seeing her as a sex symbol, unlike Marilyn Monroe)
1960’s to 1970’s –Return to skinny. With the way of supermodels like Twiggy, Naomi Sims, and Jean Shrimpton, being slim was in.
1980’s –The era of spandex and fun aerobics! This brought on women who loved the ideal of fit woman. This was to be the athletic build. Not skinny, but slim and a bit muscular. Elle Macpherson, Brooke Shields and Cindy Crawford were the popular models at the time.
1990’s –The ideal look was very waif-like and terribly skinny, even to a scary extreme. Some people coin it “Heroine Chic”. Kate Moss was very popular at this time.
2000’s –Healthy and slim. As long as you are comfortable in your skin and healthy anything goes. As long as you are happy. There are so many sizes and shapes now that are deemed beautiful and it is the perfect time. If you want to see more about women throughout not just the decades, but centuries, this was a great site to see how the ideal woman changed. I find that the evolution of beauty to be remarkable how much it changes. As of lately, I feel that we have become more open to what we consider an ideal beautiful look, but as I mentioned before, it is all in what you consider beautiful. If you think you are attractive and radiant beauty, then it will come off that way! Think beautiful – Be beautiful.
Fairy TaleI can speak of experience that when I was younger, our ideal of beauty was through what we would see in our heroes, which at such a young age was our Disney princesses. There is an actual feminine ideal that it portrays and let me tell you, not too many women fit it! Usually the women’s proportions would be highly impossible (without falling over all the time) with small features (like nose and lips) with huge eyes. The ideal beauty they were portraying was to be of Caucasian descent and tall. So that is probably less than 10% of people! Come to think of it now, those princesses were not the best ideal bodies. They were practically unattainable and until recently, they were all white. Luckily, we were young and probably didn’t really catch on. All I know is I loved Cinderella’s dress and shoes, I wasn’t really watching her hip to breast ratio!
A scientific perfect body??This topic is such a hot topic that even schools have an opinion about it! Apparently, a study at the University of Texas has come up with the perfect woman. In the article, it explains that the perfect size is 1.68m tall (5’ 5”) and her measurements are 99-63-91 cm (39-25-36 inches) I don’t know about you, but I found these measurements to be a bit extreme. But all I find is that doing a scientific experiment on something so subjective and personal is rather a waste of time. Beauty and ideal images have so many different factors, and ones that are not so black and white. Technically then, I am not the ideal size and never will be. But according to the article, even the model who they found was to be deemed the “perfect woman” was teased and bullied in school, so I guess no one is safe!
All these ideas, which one is right?My point to show all these different ideals of beauty is to show that it doesn’t matter! There is no absolute ONE idea of beauty. It’s all completely subjective and it doesn’t matter if you’re tall or skinny or full figured or white or black or brown or purple… everyone is beautiful. I want every person reading this to know that you are capable of being drop dead gorgeous. It’s all in your mind and how you portray it. Be confident, be strong and know that you are the only one that looks like this and you should be proud of it!
Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart.
– Kahlil Gibran
Why do we wear makeupTo not wear makeup, we should understand why we wear it in the first place. I read this and was so intrigued by it that I knew I had to put it on here. I was looking up why we wear makeup, not just the simple reason to look better, but a more detailed explanation and on Psychology Today had a quick article about it! 1) Red lipstick Women who wear red lipstick are more attractive to men. According to the article, there was a test done where at a bar they had women wear different colors (like pink, brown, and none) and the women who wore the red were approached earlier! 2) Wearing Foundation Wearing foundation is to make us appears healthy and young. When we don’t wear makeup, that is what we strive for, to look even toned. They did an experiment where they asked men what they liked best on a women. They showed women wearing different levels of makeup and their favorite was the one woman who was just wearing foundation, nothing else. 3) Eyes Wearing eye makeup to make the eye appear larger is very popular. But in essence, the eye appearing larger is just another characteristic of youth. 4) Blush Although we like to have a nicely even toned face, we also like to have a bit of redness to our cheeks. This is for other reasons besides showing off our cheekbones. There is actually a primal reason, and that goes to our menstrual cycle and when we are most fertile. So by applying blush we are signaling that we are ready for some love and men understand that without even knowing it! 5) An overall healthier look Wearing appropriate makeup really has the ability to make you appear healthy. By evening out your skin tone and brightening up your eyes. But does anyone ever think that possibly we can do this without actually depending on makeup to do it? It seems that in the end, we wear makeup to look young. To try to encapsulate the youth, but if we are no long young does that seem that we are chasing something that we will never win? Is it possible to be beautiful without makeup? Of course it is! Let’s see how we can do this…
Beauty from the Inside First
“Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you who you are.”
– Jean Anthelme Brillat-SavarinWhat a brilliant man, even hundreds of years later he is still right about this. If you fill up your body with terrible quality food and junk, then you know that your skin will establish that. It isn’t necessary either to go on to one extreme and only drink green drinks with wheat grass and whatever is the new and latest fad. It is simply eating a healthy (read: balanced) diet that consists of more than enough fruits and vegetables. Don’t forget to drink water either! With your body mainly composed of it, it is so imperative that you replenish it throughout the day. According to UWHealth, drinking water is crucial because skin is just like another organ in your body. It is made up of cells that need water every day. Without even knowing it, we lose so much of it through our daily life and what we do. If it is not replenished then our skin (and other organs) will suffer and will not properly function. Also to add, that our skin isn’t the most important organ in our body either. Just as when we get cold, the body warms up the core of our body and leaves the extremities until we can warm up properly, the nutrients and water will go to more “important” parts of our body. But it is not only water that is so important to our skin. We need to be eating vitamins and minerals daily as well. Just like when most of us go to college, we start to break out a bit more, and fast food, high fat, low nutrient food is the culprit! We are all very guilty of trying to do the lazy thing and rub creams and soaps all over our skin in hopes to work miracles. That sadly is only a band-aid if that even does anything different.
Exercise to healthier skinGetting your blood pumping is one of the best ways to get that rosy glow on your skin. It’s not only great for your heart and your circulatory system, but it removes toxins and gives you more energy. Even moving and doing simple exercises can help you benefit with smooth and radiant skin. Pick up a daily walk and with every step watch your face become brighter!
So, for your health and your face…Water, fruits and vegetables and all the rest is just nice. But let me chime in on a little experiment. After my husband and I became plant-based my skin has become so much better (and very predictable!) which is so nice because I am 30 years old and breaking out at this age is embarrassing. I started to drink more water, and it’s funny because the more I drank, the more I wanted. I am not suggesting to go plant based for your skin, I am suggest to eat more fruits and vegetables and lay off the processed as much as you can. We have a rule, if it comes from a box or plastic, we don’t eat it. ( Or not to make a habit out of it) By eating healthier, it really has improved my skin where if I don’t wear makeup, I don’t even notice the difference! (And we are notoriously our harshest critics!)
Beauty is from the graceful and sweet
“Make-up can only make you look pretty on the outside but it doesn’t help if your ugly on the inside. Unless you eat the make-up.”
– Audrey HepburnBeing beautiful is more than just wearing your hair nicely and applying some lipstick. And for good reason! Not only does speaking highly of others make you appear more attractive, but even thinking good thoughts of others on a regular basis can and will soften your look. When you speak kindly of others, it is an outward perception of how you think as well. When you can see the good in people, it is evident and others will take notice. Do you remember when we were younger how our mothers would say if we make a funny look our face will stay like that? Well, there is a little truth to that! When you spend your life being angry at people or stressed out there will be more lines that appear in places you don’t want there to be lines. Let’s just go ahead and say this together. Lines are inevitable, it’s perfectly normal and even alluring. Okay, now that we know we are going to have wrinkles – we can always try to have happy wrinkles, not frowning ones. Being a humble and happy person will leave that twinkle in your eye that is so intriguing and admirable. Think and say only good thoughts of people and you will be surprised at the results!
Grooming Must-Haves and Beauty Tips
Morning:Don’t wash it, just splash some refreshing water and wash the sleep from your eyes. Facial massage to stimulate lymphatic system and bring blood to your face To make my eyes appear more awake, I curl my eyelashes. That is it. No mascara, but just curl them a few times to make sure they stay. I also carry it around with me. But you would be surprised after you curl them, how people often think you look more awake (and even wearing mascara!)
Afternoon:Spritz some water on your face. If you want to buy those water in those spray cans, those are very nice. However, it can be an unnecessary expense. I suggest going to the dollar store and buying those tiny travel size spray bottles and filling it with distilled water. Then you can spray whenever in need of a refresher. Because you are most likely out in public, anything would be inappropriate, but a quick rubbing the lips together will get the blood rushing to the lips and make them red. Same with a quick few pinches of your cheeks to get that rosy glow. Rest your eyes even by accentuating your blinks to keep your eyes from becoming dry and red.
Evening:(this seems to be when most of the grooming takes place!) Tweez at this time to be able to let your face cool down and rest. Pay attention to your eyebrows, sideburns, chin, and upper lip. Get the brightest light, if your don’t have one, your phone light is surprisingly very good. Wash your face every night. Use the most gentle soap, you want to keep those harsh chemicals from your face. To be honest, there are times I just warm water and wipe. Sometimes, your face will love the little break. Exfoliate as much as your skin can handle. I do this every other to every 2 days. You will be able to tell if your face is irritated or very dry. Wash your hair as much as necessary. I can go every 3 days to wash my hair. Even 4 is possible if I need to. Clean hair is a sure fire way to look simple elegant, no matter your hairstyle. I enjoy washing it at night because it gives my hair time to air dry and no heat needed. Take care of your teeth! A confident smile says a thousand words!
Love yourself without the maskThis may be the hardest thing in my whole post. It is easy to not wear makeup, because that means you’re naked and naked in front of others. But when you can become comfortable being completely yourself, it is a very freeing feeling. If the thought of not wearing any makeup scares you, you’re not alone. We are all very insecure beings and we feel that if we can cover our faces that people can’t see the real us, and that is very wrong. If you haven’t tried going bare before, start tomorrow! Wear one less piece of makeup, it could be eye liner, mascara, eyebrow filler – anything! Keep practicing this daily. After a week goes by, eliminate another layer. I recommend doing it this way because when you see yourself from all or nothing it can be quite a shock. Even by not having blush can seem like drastic difference, that is why slowly doing it over weeks can allow yourself to get used to what you see!
Some affirmations are:
I am beautiful, I am radiant, I am perfect the way I am
A smile is the fastest way to be beautiful
I am beautiful today.
I will never be more beautiful than I am right now.Remember the questions that I asked you earlier? Now that you know how different everyone’s ideas are different and can develop some better habits to improve your appearance, take what you don’t like about yourself and showcase it. Be proud of your large nose or your wrinkled eyes. What do you love most? Use those attributes give you the confidence.
What about acne?We all go through breakouts from time to time and I know there are times in our life that we might have acne or blemishes on our face and the scariest thing would be to go out without any covering. There are times when we have to either face the consequences of bad habits and have breakouts. But for the teenagers or other women and men who face blemishes while even eating healthy, I know first hand how hard it can be. But let me tell you, the idea that people are “staring” at it or pointing it out, is usually all in your head. It rarely is as bad as you think. I know that when I broke out and it was in an obvious spot, I would cave and put some cover up on it. But not the thick foundation, just a light dusting of powder. I still wanted it to breathe and I didn’t want to cover it up too much. Sometimes, that is more obvious that then pimple itself!
To reduce the redness
- Stop touching it!
- Spray cooled water on face.
- Ice or frozen spoons can really help to cut the redness.
To reduce the swelling
- Ice always does a fantastic job at bringing down the swelling
- I know that people always stress to NOT pop it, however, when it reaches the certain point, that a simple squeeze to drain it out always helps.
- Drink lots of water.
- Wash your face often (but not over washing!)
- Don’t eat late at night.