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So you’ve decided to embrace living life more elegantly.

You’ve looked at yourself and decided that it was time for a positive change in your life and experience it with passion and fire!

Well now what is there to do?  

This vital part is crucial to any success. That is tackling it without getting overwhelmed, which leads directly to quitting.

You may not want to hear this, but the truth hurts, here it goes…

You will make mistakes. You will fail. You will think you will never be able to attain this new lifestyle.  That developing poise in today’s world is practically impossible!

However, (here comes the good news)… like anything else, with practice you can achieve anything you put your mind to. That is including but not limited to, embracing and unleashing your new elegant lifestyle.   

This may be difficult, but very rewarding! Trust me there will be times when it will be too hard and you WILL fail. That is perfectly OK, but don’t let it get you down!

“Quality is not an act, it is a habit.”

– Aristotle

It took me many awkward moments and slip-ups until finally what I was practicing was coming naturally to me.  

As humans, we love familiarity and routine and hate change. So even though we may be developing habits to better our self, our body will resist it. But our brain has something our body doesn’t, and that is persistence! And just like the old saying goes, persistence always pays off!

Changing anything is hard, let alone something your used to doing everyday. But, you can’t let the small failures make you quit! Promise yourself that you will give yourself a fair chance, and truly try.

I had and still do have hiccups where I lash out on my husband when he leaves me no more toilet paper and it’s in the middle of the night, instead of dealing with an issue gently and with poise. I let anger and frustration get the best of me.

I get loud sometimes, I can leave things laying around and be messy, but it is how you deal with it is most important! Isn’t that really like anything in life?  

Think of yourself as a work-in-progress so be gentle and accept whatever comes your way.  

Okay, so we got that out of the way. Let’s begin!  

First things first.  


Grab yourself a binder to write your thoughts in.

By jotting down your thoughts and ideas it helps to free up your mind and relieve stress.

Write down on a piece of paper a few thoughts.

1)    A few role models that you wish be more like. There can be a few different ones that can be for different aspects of your life.  

  For example, my role models I know this is not uncommon, but my role model for fashion and lady-like charm is Audrey Hepburn. She is so wonderful, she is definitely my girl crush.   

 They don’t even have to be real, I know this might be silly but for such graceful movements I recently watched Cinderella the cartoon from the 50’s, and I thought how graciousCinderella was dealing with the attitude from her step-sisters and step-mother.  

 It could be someone like a grandmother or a mother, maybe an aunt. Regardless, notice people who inspire you and study their movements, voice, and general demeanor.  

2)    How do you want to change yourself? How do you see yourself in a month? What certain things do you like about yourself, what things do you hate, what things do you think need improvement. Having things written down that you need to focus on helps to better them or to stop doing it.

A good example that I think a lot of women like me is being quick to nag. That definitely needs improvement! (Unless you leave me with no toilet paper, then I have every right!)

3)    Get a list started about your home, everything you want to get done. I don’t mean renovations, but chores. I know this might be overwhelming but do understand that this is not to be done all at once! But again, by having it written down it really helps to free your mind of the troubles.  

4)    Anything or time of day that you want to have organized.

For example, I love routines and structure. So when I began my new journey, I realized I am more productive if I have a morning routine, afternoon routine, evening routine, a cleaning routine for everyday of the week. Clearly I adore lists. So just write down the routines you want to make, don’t actually create them just yet.  

However, you can have all these routines but they are fluid and forever-changing. Don’t take yourself too seriously!

5)    Last but not least, write down a few goals that you would love to make happen.

Some popular ones are save money, keep a tidy house, cook every meal, learn a new language, lose weight, this section is very personal. The idea here is that we make these happen because they’re goals, not dreams. Once we get these goals figured out we now have to make steps to make them happen.  

I don’t want to overwhelm you with having you write down too much. And if at any time you feel like it is too much just stop and take a break. It is imperative that you take breaks and give yourself the time it takes to change.


I know from experience that if I feel like it is too much for me that I will think I am failing and never going to make it. But if I give myself some time away from it, when I return I am more refreshed and more excited and more productive!  

After you get a few things written down, set that binder aside to where you can always get to it when needed because this will be your best friend. We will eventually grow your binder as you get better and better. But again, to not overwhelm we start small.  


Now look at your underwear drawer.

Yes, your panties!  

The look of this drawer can be very telling about a person.

How does it look? Is it a shoveled mess? Or is it a very neat and tidy? Mine used to be so messy. It was very embarrassing! I didn’t give my things the respect they deserved.

After my lifestyle transformation I realized how important the little details were. So I forced myself to keep my drawers beautiful so every morning I look at them and I remember to keep things beautiful. It really is a little energy boost.  

I was always skeptical, but trust me, the little things that seem like nothing, are really the most important.  

Now it just is a habit, I wouldn’t have it any other way. It is just the way I fold and keep them.

Anyways, so take those panties out and sort through them! The ones with holes, elastic is too stretched, or faded, discard them now!  Get them out of your life! You deserve better!

Now you may only have 5 pairs, but those 5 pairs make you feel sexy, elegant, and will always enhance your mood. Take good care, wash them on gentle cycle or by hand, and wait to acquire more.  

Quality always over quantity! Always!    

I always think of what my mom used to say, “What if there’s an emergency and now doctors and nurses will see you have ugly/dirty/holey underwear?!!!!”

Ok well yes, I understand this makes sense, but please, I do think that if I was in the emergency room, my underwear will be the last thing on my mind.

Oh well, just have only beautiful unmentionables and it will never be on your mind I guess.


After you wake up, where is the next place you naturally go?

To the bathroom of course!

So let’s move to the bathroom. How does it look? Is it cluttered with bottles and lotions? Is it clean and sparkling? If it needs improvement, (which if it was anything like mine, it will!) then make notes.  

Again, if you have the energy and time, deep clean that bathroom and purge yourself of everything you don’t need in there. But because I am against doing too much at once, write down on a piece of paper what needs to get done and put it in your binder.  

But before we leave, wipe down the mirror, the sink, and toilet. Change the hand towel to something beautiful and clean. Sweep the floor and clear all the clutter on the counter top. That right there is enough to inspire beauty for the day. Now, everyday look at how it makes you feel and promise yourself to keep those few things done.

It really only takes a few minutes, especially if you’re prepared. Next to my hand towel I have a designated face cloth that is meant to dry the sink and faucet after I am done using it.

My sink always looks sparkling. In the cabinet, keep a roll of paper towel and a small spray bottle with a cleaner for your mirror. After you finish with the mirror, use the same paper towel and a quick wipe of the toilet and your practically done!  
Look at your makeup drawer and hair things. Now throw out anything you don’t use or need anymore. Again, just give yourself time. But because this is for the first day you decide to change, look at the things that you use everyday and organize that.  


This is very important and for some the most overwhelming!

I used to have so many clothes, from shirts that are all very similar, to pants and sweaters.  

Ok, for my next step some people may disagree with this.  

But I like to take everything out. Absolutely everything. This could be scary to see such a mountain of clothes but for me it helps to put in my favorite clothes back in a closet that is empty and clutter free.  

So this may take some time, but let it be. Don’t rush it because you will end up in the same situation.

Have a few piles. One for donation or hand me down to a friend, one for garbage (this pile should be small and some clothes can be made into rags), one for keeping, and seasonal.  

This will be the most lengthy thing you do for your first day. But it will make you feel the best. If you need to, take a quick break. This may take a few days, or all in one day it depends on how motivated and energy you have.

But whatever you do, PLEASE do not put it on your bed!


  1. You just made it beautifully.
  2. They may get sat on by your little dog that loves to help you whenever possible.
  3. If you need to take a break and begin tomorrow, they will eventually get thrown on the ground.

The best way to do it, you can put them in a different room. That way it keeps your bedroom still clean. That way if it takes a few days to finish it, it won’t impede on  your elegance and the clutter won’t drive you crazy!


Well you made it!

This was the first step to living your new lifestyle.  

Being elegant is much more than tidying a bit here and purging yourself of ratty clothes, however, this is an ongoing process.  

Today may have seemed shallow and common sense, but trust me, when you wake up tomorrow and follow my seven tips to a better morning routine, you will be off to a great start.

Better than today and that is all we can ask for.  

When you are feeling overwhelmed, or unmotivated, refer back to your binder and read your goals. Look at your role models, and let them inspire you. Take your time.

Before leaving your bedroom, put on the clothes you love, add a spot of makeup, dab on your favorite perfume, comb your hair and walk out knowing you look your best.

You are poised.  You are beautiful.

Unleash your elegance today!